As Much as You do it unto the Least of These, You've Done it unto Me...

When we first moved to Kenya, it seemed I was writing updates all the time; there were so many new things happening to us every day.  But after 6 ½ years, living in Kenya mostly seems normal to me now; and my life is no more extra-ordinary than anyone else’s.  Yes, we have frequent electrical outages (in the last week, I think we’ve had a total of 48 – 56 hours of electricity, and many of the missionaries were out of water for several days, even a week).  Yes, travel is, well, a challenge.  Yes, it is difficult to work with a culture that thinks totally differently than we do.  But this stuff doesn’t seem like anything to write home about.  It’s just a part of living here, and we’ve all learned to cope with it.  Yes, we have frustrations – but so does everyone, everywhere; we’re no different in that respect.

It may sound odd coming from a missionary who sold everything and moved to Africa, but I have recently found myself praying for God to move me beyond my comfort zone and into a life that requires deeper faith.   I have long believed one of the reasons we don’t think we see God moving in amazing ways is because everything we do, we do in our own strength.  We calculate, plan, take pros and cons into consideration, take personality tests to see which ministry we might be naturally good at…and only then do we think about stepping out; we throw the words, “in faith” at the end because we know we’re supposed to.  But, why does God need to move miraculously when we’ve got all the bases covered (or at least, think we do)? 

So, I’ve been praying for God to move me beyond this.  It’s a scary prayer. 

In addition to this, God brought a couple of books my way – both by Francis Chan.  One is called The Forgotten God, and the other is called Crazy Love.  At the same time I was reading these books, I was also carefully reading through the Old Testament book of Isaiah.  It was amazing how beautifully what I was reading from Francis Chan dove-tailed with what I was reading in Isaiah, and how altogether, they were working in my heart on the very issues I had been praying about. 

On Wednesday of this past week, I was reading in Crazy Love, and Francis Chan was talking about the two greatest commandments: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength; and love your neighbor as yourself.  As Christians, we are all very familiar with this; we take it for granted.  But it really hit me in a fresh way when he used his own daughter as an example.  If his own daughter were homeless, destitute, hungry, how would he want fellow Christians to minister to his daughter?  Then, he also talked about what Jesus said:  “As you do unto the least of these, you have done unto me.”  Take a moment and let that sink in.  These are some hard hitting passages – ones that, in truth, we like to gloss over and/or spiritualize.  Ones of which we like to think “I’m doing enough of this.”

I am no “Super-saint.” I know many people think missionaries are; we’re not.  We’re just regular people like everyone else.  We have fears and struggles and sins to deal with.  We like comfort, security, and roots; and we like to be in control of our circumstances just as much (sometimes more) as anyone.  But all this really stirred in my heart causing me to asked God to help me not just talk about sharing the love of Christ – but to really share the love of Christ.  To really love others as myself, looking out for their best interests.  To make me flexible (when I am flexible, you know it’s a “God” thing and not a “me” thing).

Thursday, I went to our missionary women’s Bible study.  I walked in and the women were talking about a children’s home just down the street.  A lovely young British lady runs it; her name is Jedidah.  Jedidah had just called one of my friends to ask if she was interested in taking in a preemie baby girl.  My friend has a new born baby they are in the process of adopting, so she couldn’t take her.  Suddenly, I found myself saying, “I wonder what Roger would say to us taking her?”  Here I am, Lord.  Send me.  That's what Isaiah the Prophet said.  I called Roger, and he wanted to know if it would be truly helpful to Jedidah for us to take the little girl for a while.  He asked me to find out, then call him back a little later; I think he wanted to pray about it.  Jedidah said it would be an answer to prayer.  When I told Roger, he said, “Call her; tell her we’ll do it.”

Here’s one of the neat things about this.  Just as Jedidah was getting my text message, she had been praying, asking God how she was going to handle having a preemie who needed 24hr personal care, when one of her other small girls was getting discharged from the hospital after having a collapsed lung.  She thought about coming to Bible study and asking us ladies if any of us would be willing to help, but then she couldn’t come.  It was at the moment of this prayer that she received my text message.  God certainly works in mysterious ways.

So, there is a new little girl in our household.  She is one month old, and her name is Chloe. She was born on September 17^th, and she weighs barely 3.3 pounds – not at birth, right now.  She’s itty-bitty.  She’s been on a feeding tube, so I’ve been teaching her to use a bottle.  I had to start by feeding her through a syringe; this is preemie care in Kenya.  I’m not sure how long we’ll have her, but it looks like it will be about 4 weeks.  

Roger said he's seen toothpicks bigger around than her fingers.

These pictures don't even really give an accurate portrayal of how tiny she is.

Chloe in the doll cradle with a doll made by Aunt Lee Tate

The bottle is bigger than her head!  Her head, by the way, fits in the palm of my hand.

There are no preemie diapers in Kitale; these are newborn size.

Roger is so great with her!

The boys captivated by this tiny little girl :-)

Necessity is indeed the mother of invention.  Need a mosquito net?  Just find a lace curtain!

Her favorite sleeping position - hands right up by her face.

Josiah said, "Mom, it's not that I mind holding her, I'm just so afraid of dropping her!"

We had nothing for baby care, so Chloe is sleeping in a little doll cradle Roger's dad made for Emily years ago.  For mosquito netting, I found a piece of lace curtain that works perfectly.  Our biggest challenge has been just getting her to eat with a bottle, and keeping her body temperature up.  I'm not sure what her gestational age was at the time of birth - I'm guessing anywhere from 28 - 32 weeks - so, we have to be careful of drafts and hypothermia.  The poor child has not an ounce of fat on her; her skin hangs on her as if waiting for her to grow into it.

Please be praying for us and for little Chloe.  For us, pray for wisdom, strength, courage.  For Chloe, pray for her precious little body to grow healthy and strong.  Also, pray for us that this will just be our first step of faith; oh how I long to be faith filled – totally confident in God’s love and provision for me so that I can step out and willing give these things to others as He leads me.  It’s a journey for each of us, isn’t it?

The Open Door - A Mother's View

I stood silently as I watched her go through the security check point.  There was so much to say, but I could only hope she knew my heart.  She wasn’t a little girl anymore; yet, she was still my little girl.  She carried herself with a quiet confidence that I new held at least a bit of false bravado as part of the recipe.  Others would not know this about her.  What would she do without us?

What would we do without her?  Only God knew.  God knew.

If she knew I was watching, waiting for her to clear security and disappear from view, she hid it; she never looked back.  I wasn’t hurt; I knew her too well.  She needed to have it like this – a quick good-bye with tears held in check.  Well, almost in check.  I tried; for her sake, I really did try.  I couldn’t quite succeed, but I didn’t worry too much about it; she knew me too well to think a few tears wouldn’t escape the confines of my lashes – the clutches of my will.

She knew I needed to have it like this – to have a trace of my emotions slip through.

I continued watching as she slipped off her shoes, almost forgot to remove her watch, placed her backpack on the conveyor belt, removed her lap-top from its case and placed it in a separate basket, and stepped into the dreaded x-ray machine, raising her arms over her head as it scanned.  She did it like a pro – as if she had done it a myriad of times before…which of course, she had.  Where had the little girl gone who needed us to tell her how to do this?  She was gone…

…and yet, somehow not gone.

I walked to where I would be able to see her pass the final barrier that protected the travelers from the onlookers – the stayers.  I could not turn away; I needed to keep my gaze on her until she slipped irrevocably from my sight, from my reach.  I let the tears fall as she stepped into the corridor and purposefully walked, head held high and back rigid, through the open door.

Through the open door.

I knew the significance of that.  I wondered if she thought about it, too.  I can’t imagine her not; it was she who had taught it to me.  She disappeared from sight, and yet I stood a moment longer as if her presence had not yet totally slipped from the room and I was waiting for the last vestiges of her to dissipate. My mother’s heart had not changed, but in that moment my role changed drastically and permanently.  I felt it keenly, and it cut deeply.  She was leaving me.

I was leaving her.

Eight thousand miles and four years would not provide much opportunity to actively be a part of her life, but it couldn’t change who I was…who she was…who we were together.  I closed my eyes as her father took my hand and led me away.

Her FATHER took my hand and led me away.

They wrapped their arms around me to love me, to comfort me, to support me.  We approached the airport exit and he reached to gentlemanly open the door for me.  He said no words with his lips, but through his eyes his heart spoke volumes.  “I know,” it said to me. “I know.  I feel it, too.  It hurts, but we’ll get through this together.  She’ll be okay.”

HE said no audible words, but through my spirit HE whispered directly to my heart.

“It’s okay, I’ve got her,” HE said to me.  “I love her even more than you do.  She was mine before she was yours; I will never leave her or forsake her – or you. Trust ME.”  And I knew…

...as they opened the door...and I walked through...

...she hadn't walked through that door alone.

Well, I can't believe how quickly this term has gone.  It seems like just yesterday we were leaving the States to come back to Kenya, and now, here we are 2 years later going back to the States.  Unreal.  We are currently in Nairobi - having said good-bye to all our dear friends in Kitale and to all our pets :-( - waiting to go to the airport at midnight tonight.

Amy and Princess - our prodigal cat.  Praying she's still here when we return.

So many special people...

...what a blessing they all are!

Amy and Ellie

4 of our 6 cats.  From left to Right front...Princess, Marshy, Neko, Punky

Doing some gardening with the dogs hanging around.  The one by Josiah is Bear.  In the background is Stonewall.  Not sure where Annie is...

More dear friends.  This is Emily with Ethan Beagle.

My dear high school friend, Beth Ann Downer.

Beth Ann with Amy and Josiah.

Amy holding a baby at In-Step.

My dear friend, Meredith Stewart.

It's been a crazy term on the emotional side, but we've all come out with our emotions on the up-side, and I think most of us are not truly ready to leave, though we're ready to be with friends and family in the States.  I know that doesn't make much sense, but I think most missionaries can identify with the statement.  It's actually a good place to be; it means we are at peace with where God has us.

Amy, I believe, has had the most dramatic turn-around this term.  She's gone from truly hating being in Kenya, to totally finding her place here and being at peace.  It makes leaving difficult for her because it upsets her sense of identity and location.  Again, not that she's not excited about being with friends and family...she is.

Emily is the one who is most anxious to go, which is to be expected.  Leaving Kenya this time around ends a chapter of her life - a very important one.  But, it also means a new one is beginning.  And it's not just the beginning of a chapter.  It's like those very long fiction novels with many chapters which are in turn divided into parts...Part I may have 10 chapters, as might Parts 2 and 3.  Well, this isn't just the beginning of a new chapter, it's the beginning of a new "Part," and she's raring to get going on it.  It's another one of those bitter-sweet things.  We're excited for her too, but can hardly comprehend the fact that she won't be returning to Kenya with us.  I cried our last morning in Kitale (Sunday morning) as I hugged Emily while standing in the room she shares with Amy.  Hard to imagine, it may be 5 years or more before she's ever in that room in our house again...

But, I'm not thinking too much on that right now.  We're thinking about things like parents and brothers and sisters, Sand Lake, Emmanuel Baptist Church in Bellbrook, Ohio, Bob Evans, El Toro, Longhorn Steakhouse, Dairy Queen...you know, all the important things in life ;-)

Well, I guess that's it from Kenya for us this term.  Here's to seeing you on the other side...

What is Faith?

Growing up, there was a song sung by the Cathedral quartet that went like this: “We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; perplexed, but not in despair.  Sometimes persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.”  I can hear them in my head as I write the words.  I loved the message and the way the music so beautifully mixed with the mood of the meaning.  The song is, of course, directly taken from II Corinthians chapter 4, verses 8 and 9. 

               

                Sometimes, this is a theological confession (something I say I believe), but not necessarily a theological function (something I live out of).  Sometimes, it is something to grasp by faith when it’s not something I can account for by sight.  At those times, it is something that sustains me through difficult circumstances.  Scripture doesn’t say, “The just shall live by their sight,” rather, “The just shall live by their faith.” 

                This brings to mind another song, this one by Michael Card.  Though not all the theology of the song is perfect, the chorus goes like this: “To hear with my heart; to see with my soul; to be guided by a hand I cannot hold; to trust in a way that I cannot see…that’s what faith must be.”  This may sound like “blind faith” to some, but as Christians, we know this faith is not blind; it is based on something.  2 Peter 1:2-12 tells us, “Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, as His divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust. But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.  For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins.  Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble; for so an entrance will be supplied to you abundantly into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”  Our faith is based on God’s “exceedingly great and precious promises.”  The faith I speak of isn’t faith in just anything, it is faith in God and the great and precious promises He gives us through the death and resurrection of His Son, Jesus Christ.  I can have faith in anything – that doesn’t mean my anything of choice is faithful.  But God is. 

                Faith is also more than mere belief or assent.  Faith does something – it acts – it becomes – it grows.  Biblical faith changes me.  Check out 2 Peter again.  Faith leads to goodness, leads to knowledge, leads to self-control, leads to perseverance, leads to godliness (Christ-likeness), leads to brotherly kindness, leads to love.  Isn’t it amazing how scripture relates to itself?  That makes me think of another scripture; this one in I Corinthians 13:1 - 7.  Paul tells the believers at Corinth, “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.  And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."  Faith that doesn’t grow into these things is seriously lacking; in fact, it is no faith at all.  That’s pretty harsh, but that’s what it says. 

                So faith says, “I don’t always feel great; I don’t always get it; but I believe in the promises of God (though I can’t always see their fulfillment), and because I believe, I can entrust myself to him and let His love flow through me to others.”

                Peter had this experience himself in the New Testament.  We find recorded for us in the Book of John chapter 6 a very famous story.  Jesus is teaching the multitudes (at least 5,000 people) and they get hungry.  Jesus asks his disciples, “What should we do?  The people are hungry.  Where can we go to buy bread?”  Phillip answered, “Lord, 200 denarii won’t buy enough bread to give all these people even a little bit.”  Meanwhile, a young boy had approached Andrew, Peter’s brother, and had offered five barley loaves and two small fish to contribute to the meal.  A lot of people look at this story to praise the young boy, but this story isn’t about him; it’s about Jesus.  Jesus took those 5 small loaves and the 2 fish and miraculously not only fed 5,000 people, but also collected 12 baskets of leftovers!

                The next day, the people followed Jesus to another place and asked him, “How did you get here?”  (They had tried to capture him to make him king, but he had escaped).  Jesus’ answer seems unexpected in the text.  “Surely, I tell you, you seek Me not because you saw the signs, but because you ate of the loaves and were filled…”

                Long story short, Jesus was saying to them, “You want physical bread.  But the sign I showed you was to point out that I am the spiritual bread from Heaven that will give you eternal life.”

                This didn’t satisfy the crowd.  They tried reason, manipulation, trickery, shame... all kinds of things to get Jesus to give them bread like He had the day before.” 

                Finally, Jesus has to spell it out for them. “Don’t you get it? I am the bread of life.  Your fathers ate manna in the wilderness and died.  I am the bread which comes down from heaven, that one may eat of it and not die. I am the living bread which came down from heaven.  If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever; and the bread that I shall give is my flesh, which I shall give for the life of the world.”

                They still didn’t get it.  They thought he meant he was literally going to give them his physical flesh to eat.  Jesus said, using very strong metaphorical language, “I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink His blood, you have no life in you.  Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day.  For my flesh is food indeed, and my blood is drink indeed.  He who eats my flesh and drinks my blood abides in me, and I in him. As the living Father sent me, and I live because of the Father, so he who feeds on me will live because of me.  This is the bread which came down from heaven – not as your fathers ate the manna, and are dead.  He who eats this bread will life forever.”

                Wow.  Yeah, that’s what they thought, too.  “This is a hard saying; who can understand it?”

                Jesus answered, “Does this offend you?” And the Bible tells us that from this time forward, many people went back and stopped following him any longer.

                Jesus looked over at his 12 apostles and asked them, “Are you going to go away as well?”

                Peter answered him…good ol’ Peter…”Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.”

                Sometimes life gets rough.  Really rough.  Sometimes we want things from God.  Yes, for many people I live around, they want bread.  Real, actual bread.  They need it.  They’re hungry.  Their families are hungry.  God provides, but not always in the same way for everyone, and many people starve to death every day.  We look at that and say, “God didn’t provide.”  For some of us, things aren’t quite that drastic.  We have food enough – more than enough – to live on.  But the bread we want is something different.  Maybe it’s a better marriage.  Maybe it’s a better job.  Maybe it’s a specific answer to prayer.  Maybe it’s to feel significant or loved.  Maybe it’s children.  Maybe it’s for a weekly paycheck to not be cut.  Maybe it’s to be understood or heard.  Maybe it’s to see growth in ministry or effectiveness in preaching.  Maybe it’s money enough to pay for your daughter’s dream college or money to pay for boarding school for your child who lives a very isolated life on the mission field.  Maybe it’s to see results…something, anything…in your work for the Kingdom of God. 

                Sometimes, God gives us these things.  Sometimes He says, “My gifts to you are to help you see the gift I give you of Myself.”  Sometimes He says, “Am I enough? What if I don’t give you these other things?  What if I don’t give you this ‘bread’ you’re asking for? Will you leave me, too?”

                I wonder what our response will be.  Who are we in this story?  The point really isn’t to be the boy – though it makes a great song.  The point is…am I the multitude?  Or am I Peter?  Will I walk away? Or will I confess with Peter, “Lord, where else would I go?  You’re the one with the words of Life.”

                This is the heart of faith.  Believing this deep down helps me to love others with the love of Christ even when things don’t make sense.  It helps me to trust God’s heart for me.  It helps me to walk in obedience in the face of hardship.  It helps me have a heart of thankfulness – because it lives in the light of His most precious gift to me; Himself. 

                When you eat bread, you don’t eat the whole loaf; you break it.  When you drink from the fruit of the vine, you’re drinking fruit that has been crushed.  Jesus was broken and crushed because he loved us.  This was the only way to give us eternal life – and Jesus was the only sacrifice sufficient. 

                What have we mistakenly, wrongly, foolishly replaced Him with? 

                Why do we spend our money and energy on that which is not food – on that which is not drink – on that which will pass through our bodies or our hands only to be forgotten and leave us wanting more?  This is such a huge theme through-out scripture.  We strive for things, we fight for things, we war for things – in our homes, our marriages, our workplaces, in our mission organizations, in our churches, in our tribes, in our countries…in our world.  Jesus says, “No, I am the bread.  I will satisfy you – if you’re really looking for Me and not just what you think you will get from me.”

                “Am I enough?  Do you get what I am for you?  I am your life – eternal life.  Or will you leave me, too?”

                               

                What is your response to Him today?  What is mine... LORD, WHERE ELSE WOULD I GO? YOU ARE THE ONE WITH THE WORDS OF ETERNAL LIFE…!

                

Thoughts on the Upcoming Kenyan Election...

Well, a month from tomorrow is the long awaited and anticipated Kenyan election.  4 weeks.  We have tried to follow all the US embassy recommendations for safety; stocking up on non-perishable supplies, phone cards (all our phone minutes are pre-paid using scratch-off cards), kerosene for our stove (that’s what all stoves here use) extra diesel for our vehicle (enough to get us to Nairobi if necessary), malaria meds, anti-biotics, amoeba medicine, extra dog food, etc.  Our freezer is completely full  with non-perishable things like flour and sugar and pasta and beans – even popcorn; these things don’t need to be in the freezer on a normal basis, but when stocking up, if these things are in the pantry more than a couple weeks they get maggots in them.  We don’t have a generator, so we really can’t buy extra meat – we have too many electrical outages, and if there are clashes after the election, who knows how long electrical outages might last.  But even if we don’t have clashes here in our town, the two main towns between us and Nairobi are known for violence over election outcomes.  Last time, you could not drive through those towns, and supplies to Kitale were basically cut off.   

So, we sit here, going on with our business as usual while we can.  Right now, things are quiet; hopefully they stay that way and all these extra goods and the extra expense will just get used up in a natural way.

My feelings and thoughts about the election are quite knotted up and difficult to untangle inside me.  I’ve talked to many people who are concerned; not because they know people who will likely be violent if things don’t go their way, but because a).  mob violence mentality, and b). there are groups of thugs that can be hired by a disgruntled party to go out and create havoc.  This is much (though not all) of what happened last time.  Why, oh, why are two of the men indicted by the International Criminal Court for atrocities after the last election allowed to continue to run for President????  They weren’t supposed to , but some Kenyan judge let them off – I wonder what he got in return?

Am I afraid?  Not yet.  I can’t live in fear for a whole month leading up to the election, but it is in the back of my mind – probably adding to the anxiety feelings I struggle with from time-to-time.

Here’s what I mostly think about.  “Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? You lust and do not have. You murder and covet and cannot obtain. You fight and war. Yet you do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures.” The Bible, book of James, chapter  4, verses 1-3.  We want things, and we want them so badly they become more important than anything else – more important than a fellow human being.  The politician wants power and control; he wants it so badly he will start a war to get it.  The hired thugs want money and power as well.  They want people to fear them; they are willing to slaughter people in order to get it.  Voters want the guy from their tribe to win because they think it will increase their power and prosperity; they will betray their long time neighbors, friends, even fellow church members to ensure this.   The problem isn’t their desire for their candidate to win; the problem is that this desire becomes all important to them so that they are willing to commit evil in order to achieve it, or commit evil if they don’t get what they want.   They demonize other tribes (or ethnic backgrounds), and slander opposition.  They even go so far as to stopping buses on the road and asking everyone from a certain tribe to get off the bus so they can slaughter them.  

I often wonder, how can human beings do this to each other?  I find myself unable to wrap my brain around it.  But then I must stop and ask myself this question: Am I really all that different at the core, or am I different only in degrees?  Which of my friends have I ever gossiped about when they did something I didn’t like?  Isn’t this a form of attack – without even the guts to do it to their face?  Doesn’t the same Bible that says the above quote also say, “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’  But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Raca!’ shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, ‘You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire.” Matthew 5:21-23 (This is Jesus speaking)  Why? Because in doing so, we commit murder in our hearts.  Jesus goes on to say that the man (or woman) who looks at a woman (or man) who is not his/her spouse is guilty of committing adultery – in their heart. 

People often wonder what Christians mean when we say that we are all sinners before God.  It’s not because we all do equally bad things to our fellow man, but because we all have equally bad sin in our hearts – before a Holy God.  What is this afterall? I may not murder and slaughter and steal, but do I throw a temper tantrum and gossip and give people the cold shoulder? It’s all the same heart;  It’s wanting my will to be done rather than God’s – the essence of idolatry. 

The Kenyan elections are a time for many things.   1.  Prayer.  My prayer for Kenya is that each man, woman, and child remembers that every other man, woman, and child is a fellow human being, created in the image of God and worthy of honor and respect  - and life.  Relationship is more important that power;  more important than being RIGHT; more important than money; more important than politics (you hear that my fellow American?).  2.  Introspection.  Rather than only seeing the sin of others and tending to put them in a lower human class than ourselves, we should see our commonness.  Where do we have the same heart but only show it in more socially acceptable ways?  King David of Israel said, “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24  3.  Peacemaking.  Jesus said in Matthew 5:9, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God.”  We need to help people find peace with one another, but they will never truly do that until they have peace with God – and peace with God only comes through a relationship with His Son, Jesus Christ. (Romans 5:1).

So please, pray for Kenya – for Kenyans; pray for their safety, pray for their peace, pray for their souls.  And I wouldn’t mind prayers for the missionaries here as well, as well as all the ex-patriots from all over the world who call this “home.”

Baba Yetu (Swahili) - Our Father

Functional Atheism

               “Ultimately, it doesn’t matter who wins the election.  I know where my hope is – it is in God.”  “I’ve read the back of the book and we win.”

               

                These are all both great statements, aren’t they? So why am I feeling so despondent after my man didn’t win? Problem is, they’re just words; well meaning, well intentioned, very Christian words.  But I don’t really believe them.  “What??  What do you mean you don’t believe them,” you ask?  I mean, God has used this election to reveal something to me about my heart. 

               

                The Radford’s and the Tate’s gathered together at the Radford’s house on November 6^th around 8:30 pm so we could watch the election together.  We played a few games and then watched CNN for a little while before going to sleep.  The plan was to wake up around 4:00am and watch the election results unfold.  We had a lot of nervousness about the election, but also a lot of hope.  Like many others, we were very angered and upset about the direction our country had taken the last four years; abortion on the rise, homosexual marriage becoming more and more accepted, legislation being passed against the will of the majority of the people…the list could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on…well, you get the picture.  We had all done our civic duty and sent in our absentee ballots, voting for the man we believed would better get our country back on the right track - voting against the man we knew was taking our country down the wrong track. We were nervous, but hopeful.

               

                That hope quickly died.  We held on to it as long as possible – probably longer.  By 10:00am our time (2am EST) our hopes for our country were dashed, and it was obvious that our nation had made a choice – a choice to turn away from its history of freedom knit together with personal responsibility; a choice to fill their bellies with what they might be able to get from people who have more than they do; a choice to take rather than to give; a choice to take the road of economic failure and moral decline.  I felt ashamed of my country and my countrymen.

               

                The mood at the Radford’s house was somber and quiet.  Nobody felt much like conversing, and Roger and I didn’t feeling like hanging around, so the Tate’s returned home to lick their wounds.  I have struggled with despondency ever since.

                This morning, I found myself asking the same question as David, the King of Israel, asked in Psalm 42:5: “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me?” Why do I feel like hope has died?

               

                Have you ever read the book of Habakkuk?  Habakkuk was a prophet of God who lived during very troubling times in Judah before the time of Christ.  God revealed to Habakkuk that He was going to punish Israel severely for her immorality and for turning her back on Him.  Punishment, Habakkuk could understand to a certain degree, but the total destruction of his nation that God told him would come at the hands of their worst enemies in the region, Habakkuk couldn’t fathom.  He questioned God’s integrity and faithfulness to His promises.  He questioned God’s lack of mercy.  He questioned God’s wisdom and goodness.  How, Habakkuk asked God, can you punish your people using a people who are far more ungodly than we are?  How can you decimate your people with whom you have sworn a blood covenant?  Habakkuk was confused, disquieted, despondent, and I think a little angry.  Until…God spoke to Him and showed him what it meant to live his life according to his faith in God.  Habakkuk surrendered to God’s will and embraced his true source of hope and life…God Himself.  And this was the whole point.

               

                Hope.  This, God has shown me over the last two days, is another worship word.  In thinking about spiritual adultery that we commit as Christians, I’ve often thought in terms of love, treasure, pursuit.  Questions like, “what do I love more than God,” or, “what do I put before God in my life,” or, “what would I be angry about if God took it away.” These are all typical x-ray questions for examining a heart of idolatry. Today, God showed me that my idolatry sometimes shows itself in the word HOPE.  When David asked himself the question about why his soul was cast down – why he was…depressed…despondent, his rebuke and encouragement to himself was to HOPE in God.  In other words, he was despondent because he hadn’t been hoping in God.  He’d been hoping in something else, and that something else had failed him.  My hope has often been in having the right political party in office, the right laws on the books, and the right people in Congress.  Oh, I would have said my hope was ultimately in God…but my despondency shows me otherwise, because when I ask myself David’s question…my soul, why are you cast down, the answer is instructive to where my hope is. 

               

                The day before the election, I prayed that God would put in as President whichever man would cause God’s people to pursue Him and His Kingdom.  I believe that God has answered that prayer.   If my health, wealth, and political power are stripped away from me, maybe I will see more clearly where my hope truly needs to be.  Maybe God is revealing to many of us who call on His name, that we have been misplacing our worship in ways we didn’t realize – hoping in something more than we hope in Him.  Maybe this will bring about repentance and renewed love and allegiance to something outside ourselves – something outside of our heritage – something outside of our country.  Maybe we’ve been worshipping these things and trying to hold onto them.  Maybe they have become our gods.  Maybe we need to get to the business of focusing our energies on the Kingdom of Heaven rather than the kingdom of America.

               

                Please don’t get me wrong.  I love my country; I appreciate and am thankful for the Christian heritage (yes, Christian heritage no matter what the newly written history books have to say)we have been blessed with,  and I will continue to have political opinions on her direction for the sake of her good.  But, oh, God, this is where my hope has been placed for far too long – way more than I realized.  Awaken me, Lord.  What folly it is to think that the spread of Your Kingdom depends on the state of America.  Forgive me.

                Now, nobody say to any sad American, “It’s done, get over it,” especially if you are not American.  There are a lot of ramifications to this election.  Allow us time to grieve.  Because though I do not want to worship my country, I do love my country, and I should be grieved at the path my people are taking as it is a path away from Christ.  It is a right and righteous grief.

                But let us do get on with the work of the Kingdom – yes, let us vote and work in the government and fight for justice in the political arena.  But more than that, let us hope in the Lord for the work and the growth of His Kingdom.  Let us love one another, love our neighbors, care for the widows and orphans, keep ourselves unspotted from sin – and do the work of sharing Jesus Christ and His Kingdom with all who are around us.